The Importance of Accepting Reality in Personal Healing

By Du Wenxuan, Shenzhen, July 3, 2017

Slow fastMy friend asked me: What is the prescription for your eyesight now? Why do you wear glasses again?

I answered: I have -3.0 prescription in one eye and -3.5 in the other. Previously, I had -5.0 in one, and -4.5 in the other. So, both my eyes have improved. Also, I feel that the condition of my eyes is quite stable.

During a previous period, while I could do without glasses, there were times that I must wear glasses. e.g. during classes when I looked at the blackboard, and driving at night etc. It was difficult not to put on glasses. However, the act of putting on and taking off glasses made me dizzy, and my eyes became dry.

Based on my knowledge in kinesiology all these years, I think I had been too eager in getting better, forcing my body to take too big a step. Since my body could not stabilize itself in such a demanding situation, it became unsteady with dizziness and dry eyes.

Now I am calmer and more patient. I allow my eyes to start at a lower level, which still represents a better level than before. Previously, I was too eager for my eyes to make a big improvement. Now, I am calmer, allowing my eyes to make a more gradual improvement. As a result, I have switched to this new pair of glasses and found that my eyes feel very comfortable. There is no discomfort, with or without glasses.

In the process, I learnt that:

One should not be too impatient, wanting to make a big leap in one go. It is impossible to get whatever I want to have. We should listen to our body carefully to understand which level it can achieve with ease, and what it can do exactly at the moment. We should then adjust our target to that level.
The process of healing my eyes is exactly the same as that for my whole person healing. We have to stabilize every step in each stage, and use that as the foundation to keep moving steadily forward.
This is like stepping on stones in getting uphill. If the foundation of the stone we step on is not stable and appears to be shaky, (1), it would be difficult for us to move to another stone; (2), it may collapse, and we have to start all over again. We should step on the stone firmly before we continue to move forward.

Healing our entire person is the same. We should let go of impatience, high expectation even though we feel that our expectation is not too high, and everyone can achieve that. As long as we cannot do it now, we have to learn to accept the objective reality. That is the current state.

Accepting reality is to stand firm on the step we have made. And then, based on this reality, we see what is the next level we can achieve.

I have now gone back to a pair of -3.0 glasses. I continue to notice consciously the way I use my eyes, and the pattern it causes stress. And I continue to release the fatigue of my eyes. Although I have let go of the desire to improve my eyesight to a particular level at a particular speed, I believe it will still continue to get better gradually. My eyes will age with time but the aging process would be slowed down.

The attitude in personal healing and treating oneself should be similarly used in parent child relationship and the interaction with children, intimate relationship and interaction with family, teacher student relationship and interaction with students. See the reality, accept the reality rather than just longing for what you expect. I think that only actions based on factual foundation would be accepted by the body or the other party.

Thanks for your questions. Your questions have inspired my reflection on the process. I want to share it with you.